Sir Wrath 309 I'm Online

* "Going to church doesn't make you christian, any more than going to McDonald's makes you a hamburger"

* "Time is the greatest teacher, unfortunately, it kills all it's students"

* "Beer kills the weak brain cells. That is why you seem smarter when you drink"

* "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." -- Thomas Edison

* "Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious." -- Brendan Gill

* "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -- Oscar Wilde

* "An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind." -- Gandhi

* "Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much." -- Oscar Wilde

* "Support your local undertaker; DROP DEAD!"

* "There are no stupid questions... only inquisitive idiots"

* "Buckle up! It makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car."

* "I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure..."

* "Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have."

* "It's only funny until somebody gets hurt. And then it's HILARIOUS!"

* "I just thought of something funny...your mother." -- Cheech Marin

The Inner me
cry's out to be heard
yurn's to be delt with
will be here to stay
The Inner Me
will come to play
will come to dream
will come to make it's own
The Inner Me
won't stop until it gets what it wants
won't stop until it is recognized
won't stop, to stop
The Inner Me
is here to stay
is here to say to its soul mate
I will not be denied
is here because it is Me!
The Inner Me

And here I am another day
Brushing back the streaks of Grey
While pushing forth in steady run
With tired dreams I chase the sun

Yet in my mind there's still some time
My heart's strong rhythms beat
A searching soul forward will go
Toward a dream someday to meet

Today life takes another year
While I choke down some lonesome fear
I've long surpassed the starting gun
With tired dreams I chase the sun

And though I know not why I run
Some voice inside pushes me on
It tells me tales of better days
And gives me strength to go beyond

And now life moves in record time
While I slow ponder of it's rhyme
And learn this race is never won
With tired dreams I chase the sun

But, won or not I still must run
Or slip and fall to darker days
Without the chase I'd lose the sun
And lose my dreams along the way

And though life asks another tear
I'll chase the sun another year
For death waits where the day is done
With tired dreams I chase the sun

I'M INVITING YOU INTO A WORLD
IN WHICH YOU NEVER KNEW
I'M OFFERING YOU AN ENDLESS DREAM
UNDER SKIES OF BLUE
WHERE EVERY MOMENT IS MAJESTIC
MAGICAL IN A SENSE
WHERE NEVER WILL YOU BE ALONE
AND THE LOVE YOU'LL FEEL IS ENDLESS
SO CLOSE YOUR EYES AND DRIFT AWAY
ABOVE WHITE CLOUDS OF VELVET
INTO THE STARS ABOVE THE MOON
BUT DON'T YOU EVER DOUBT IT
RIDE WITH ME INTO THE NIGHT
ON THE WINGS OF ANGELS
BUT NEVER CAN YOU FORGET THE FLIGHT
WHERE LOVE AND LUST ENTANGLED
SAIL WITH ME UPON THE SEAS
OF DANGER AND DESPAIR
AND LET ME HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS
AND SMELL YOUR WIND TOSSED HAIR
FLOAT WITH ME UP TO THE SUN
TO DANCE UPON THE FLAMES
TO FEEL THE HEAT TO FEEL THE PASSION
AND NEVER BE THE SAME
GLIDE WITH ME INTO THE BREEZE
OF ROMANTIC WIND
AND FALL WITH ME TO THE BEACH
TO MAKE LOVE IN THE SAND
LIVE WITH ME IN PARADISE
ENJOYING SUNSETS
ME AND YOU
I'M INVITING YOU INTO A WORLD
IN WHICH YOU NEVER KNEW

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

Is somebody not editing what I'm saying here???

I love giving opinions, I've got hundreds.

If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again; it was probably worth it.

Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.

Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

I had to hit him : he was starting to make sense.

A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense.

Wanted : Person willing to seal gas leaks with candle. Must be willing to travel.

Mind intentionally left blank...

Did you know, 50% of doctors graduated in the BOTTOM HALF of their class.

The human body was designed by a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?

If at first you dont succeed, blame someone else and seek counselling.

There are some people we *want* to offend.

Tact is for people who aren't clever enough to take the p*ss.

Why do you laugh? Change the name, and the story is told of you.

What if there were no such thing as a hypothetical situation?

Women make silly generalisations.

I'd explain it to you, but your head would blow up.

We have only 2 things to worry about: That things will never get back to normal, and that they already have.

Remember the world is a big place. Even if you're one in a million, that means 1000 people in China look exactly like you.

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

It's so late it's almost early.

You ever look up the word dictionary in a dictionary? A little hand comes out and smacks you one.

What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.

Speak softly but drive a Sherman tank.