No going back

Why? why am I always the one who has hurtful,tragic,

depressing things hapen to me? I love, I crumble into

a million tiny little shards left for me to peice my

self back togher, left for me to try unsuccesfuly to

make myself whole again. To fake a happy smile on my

tragic,horror struck face, to make everyone else think

im happy,when im just damaged,hurt,& broken, to never

be the once happy person I used to be, the person

everyone loved and wanted to be around but that will

never happen again, I will never be that person again.

Im.......who I am now.....theres no going back...

I cant be how I used to be. Not that I dont want to

but I just cant, its like theres something holding me

back and I dont know what that is so now im left, left

alone to put myself back togher unsucessfully.

Im never going to be whole.